Crazy Woman Freaks Out in Fast Food Line: A Vocabulary Lesson

What’s up Kings and Queens!

This weekend I came across a very disturbing video, featuring a woman in a red San Francisco jacket (let’s call her Franny), checking out of a fast food restaurant, accosting a couple in line for having shown a little PDA (public display of affection).

If you haven’t seen the video yet, you can check it out here. But be warned: the language used in the video is HIGHLY offensive and degrading.

While we never exactly see the act the couple was engaging in, it is assumed that the couple was kissing. The extent of the kissing, we never really know for sure, but the couple states that it was just a kiss on the forehead, and at worst we can guess that it was light kissing on the lips.

And Franny just UNLOADS on the young couple!

I won’t go too much detail in, but the major take away here is that that Franny, clearly not knowing the definition of certain terms, “confused” the young lady for a prostitute.

So, to help prevent such “confusion” in the future for any of you self-educating Kings or Queens, I feel a brief vocabulary lesson is in order.

All of the defintions I am using come Baldwin and LeVay’s textbook Dicovering Human Sexuality, 2nd ed. 


Prostitution – The act of engaging in sex for pay

Coitus – Penetration of the Vagina the Penis

Deep kissing (french kissing) – Kissing, with entry of the tongue into the partner’s mouth


Franny claims that the couple was “having sex” in the restaurant. For purposes of argument, and to give her some benefit of the doubt, let us assume that “having sex” can describe more activities than just coitus.

I am doing this because even I don’t believe that just a penis –> vagina is the only definition of having sex, and I’m sure that you enlightened readers can agree. Sex can include many different forms of intimacy and activity. That being said, let’s expand our definition here.

Let’s have “Sex” include Heavy Petting (sexually touching the partners genetalia or breasts), Mutual Masturbation (Reciprocal, simultaneius manual stimulation a partner’s genitals), and all forms of oral sex (including Fellatio, Cunnilingus, and Anilingus).  I will even give her Necking (Kissing or caressing of the head and neck), minus just a peck on the cheek or forehead, that is not overtly sexual in nature.

I am excluding both non-sexual touch such as hugging or hand-holding, and Petting (sexually touching a partner’s body, often taken to exclude the breasts or genitalia).

Even with this broad of a definition of what “having sex” could be, let us get one thing straight…

This couple was NOT having sex in their fast food line!!!

In the video, the couple describes their actions as hugging and just a peck on the forehead!

To spend over five minutes yelling at the boy and girl for something that couples -married and unmarried- do every day as a  simple way of showing affection, and then extrapolating it to accuse them of sexual misconduct unfitting of a public place, is LUDICROUS!!!

While I agree that there is a time and place for everything, and the middle of a fast food line may not be the best place to begin dry-humping, by all accounts, that is not what the couple was doing! They were showing affection to each other, and nothing more.

Not only does her reaction fall grossly outside of the bounds of our definition of what “having sex” would reason, but she goes even further to give false ideals of legal definitions of crimes.

During the video, she claims that she feels “sexually harassed.”

… Hmmm…

Sexual Harassment – Unwanted sexual advances or other intimidating sexual behavior, usually in the workplace.

The thing about sexual harassment, is that the individual filing the complaint has to be the OBJECT of the sexual advances. Since the young man was kissing his girlfriend’s forehead, a consensual act, that means the act was not sexual harassment.

And certainly not harassment directed at Franny!

She may have felt uncomfortable (clearly), and is totally justified in that, but to begin making false claims hurling insults towards a young couple that are just waiting to get their food is stepping way out of line.

It shows a total ignorance for both medical and legal definitions, as well as a lack of manners on how to handle an uncomfortable situation with tact and grace.

Franny should be ashamed… and perhaps re-enroll in her high school’s freshman Health Class to brush up on her knowledge.

The young couple, on the other hand, handled the situation with a level of poise and class that, given the same circumstances, I don’t know how I would have behaved.

So I hope you have enjoyed our vocabulary lesson for today. Take this lesson forward with you: should you find yourself face-to-face with a similarly ignorant and hostile person as Franny, remember your training.

You have the knowledge, you know the facts. And their insistence on their victim-hood does not make you less correct in the facts. Do not be shaken. Stand your ground.

And film a video to turn the entire internet against them.


Much Love,

King ❤


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